A capella Music, Thai Teens

And zero social distance

Feb 24, 2002: Today was Sunday so another Lanna Fair / Thapae Road closing from noon-late night. This one was equally fun as the previous one I went to, with different Artisans and much of the same great food. Had more mystery-meat on a stick, a bit less greasy than the last one I'd tried but I'm sure no less "organic", if you catch my drift. You can bet the casing wasn't made out of good old plastic like back home. I goofed off until hunger overtook then headed for JJ's:

I like the place for a number of reason. First, it's got aircon (unfortunately with prices reflective of that). The service is good, the food is excellent, but maybe the best part is they're delighted to help me order in Thai, and correct my mistakes. It's probably a breath of fresh air for them, after dealing with insensitive foreigners all day, to have somebody who is mellow (who?), polite, and makes a passable showing at their language. 

After 10km of walking (yesterday: 14km), and about 5 1/2 hours in blazing sun, returned home for a bath (rest for my feet, eliminate the stink from the rest of me), I returned to AUA (near JJ's), where a free a capella concert was scheduled for 7:30. The concert was okay, you get what you pay for to an extent (even here, where most everything seems cheap), the group was college students. What made the evening memorable was not the music, but watching the Thai teens and how they interact. It was really the first time, save for seeing a few here and there, on the bus or in a shopping center. Another foreigner, Annette, a Music Teacher at local Payap University, was there and we talked for a bit about Thai students, her progress with learning Thai, and the challenge I (and every other foreign student of Thai) have.

They were all over each other. I don't mean boys and girls "necking", in fact all the interaction was between the boys. Couples might hold hands, but no kissing or anything as crude as that's thought of (in public) in Thai society. But the boys would touch each other around the waists, they'd put arms around one another. Hold hands sometimes. It was genuine, non-self-conscious affections for their friends, not anything sexual. It made me kind of jealous, that boys in our culture are categorically prohibited from any kind of [non-violent] touching, for fear of being branded "gay" — whether the moniker is meant (not usually) or not. We can strike our friends, but we'd better not touch them with any level of tenderness. 

On stage, the five guys sat down on a couch on stage that practically speaking had room for four. Ditto, very close; none of the feigned discomfort required if American teen boys (gasp!) were required to sit close to each other... touching... other boys. Scandal! I was nearly incredulous that these kids could sit with their entire sides, from their knees to their butts, touching one another, and still look comfortable?. Strong cultural training (mine) or what?

I guess I wouldn't have given this another thought if it hadn't been reinforced almost immediately afterwards. I returned to Thapae St , and watched some really remarkable breakdancing. It drew quite a crowd, and as I was standing (I can see over most everybody there), I felt the warmth of somebody else's body next to mine. I am pretty street-smart, so I've got my hands in my pocket, holding my wallet. But nobody's trying to steal it (my first thought). It's just a kid, a teen boy, moving in for a better view. The warmth feels odd, but once the fear of being an imminent crime victim passes, it's pleasant. Which of us disdains the warmth of another?

The notion is called "social distance"; it describes the invisible circle that each of us requires in order to feel the appropriate level of independence. Should you think this bunk or psycho-babble, next time you're talking with anyone except someone you're intimate with, step closer to them (it's more entertaining with strangers). And closer. At some point they'll stop back. Arabs, Italians, Mediterranean people have a relatively small social distance. Americans have a relatively large social distance. Thai's decidedly... don't.

The Lanna Fair was much more active at night, where the temperature drops to around 70F (the Thais put on jackets). There are some crowds and human traffic jams along the way. And the same thing happens, en masse. All of a sudden I'm surrounded by others bodies, with no space between us. This time it's a little uncomfortable; not the proximity per se but sort of being pushed along.

I love Thailand, for the cultural things I understand and for those I don't. This concept — about social distance, is well documented, but I was frankly surprised that it would happen between complete strangers, even with foreigners. With me.

Here are a few photos from today's fair: